What belongs to us [By Jesse Lee Gray]
Could fit into a large suitcase
Or a small backpack
Depending on how much
we cling to things
Living will teach us
That what we think we have
Can turn to ash overnight
Places we knew we belonged
turn
Out of nowhere
Into enemy territory
With exit indicated
By a fresh foe
The moment may not be clear
Only later will we note
what’s been lost
Or lent or left behind
Emptying pockets
to find it’s just not there
The horror
The beauty
Is the trade
Less of what’s lost
Means more of
What still belongs to us
our approach to now
And what we choose
to give our love
How willing we are to let go
Of sweaters that no longer fit
And friendships
that have become faulty
What belongs to us
Gets jumbled with
What we need to belong
But both relate
To how solid we feel
In our skins
And what we create
As we shed old ones
What we hold onto
Is what defines us
And that, aha, that cuts both ways
What belongs to me
Is less and less
The longer I live
Not even my heart is mine
And often not the tongue
That sits in my mouth
Not the deco
in these furnished apartments abroad
Not the truths held up as universal,
that aren’t
Not other people’s potential,
that dead weight to dreams
Shake that shit off
More traded for fewer
With daunting depth
In what remains
And a choice
Of how high I hold my head
How hard I squeeze the pole
On this high-wire
To avoid looking back or away
How well I look ahead
and into eyes
of the only other person
Holding the same balance baton
Walking backward with me
And how long I can go
Without looking down