i got lost + the promise we live by [by Dans Karagannis]
i got lost,
figure seventh grade
unrecognizable, just enough
always happy, just enough
i guess
seven years,
it ached, it throbbed, it grew louder
fierce chaos, wild despair
to be alone,
a safe place,
never earned
this hurts so fucking bad
engulfed, i fucking hate that word
good luck
do not fucking cry
am i about to throw up?
i'm gonna throw up
don't you dare
proof we are the energy we carry:
my body,
a faint tip
gentle vibrations,
i float
self destruct, I'm aware
reconstruct, I can't go on
the whiplash lashed to find
and now we know
the promise that we live by
with that first inhale,
6:50 am
fill my chest,
i'll hold you comfortably
quietly, intimately
a release
a slow surrender
it feathers just beneath
this moment, this right now
a settle through my body
you're okay, you're okay, you're okay
it's bright,
that grey overcast
it whispers, hush my dear
as damp air brushes the sides of my face
they too pass by,
here and there, there and here
it brushes on them, too
i reach the edge
still soft, still blue
that ocean, she glides
as i grow closer, the orange sets in
as i hold still
7:30 am
the sound of my lighter
the rings beneath my thumb
salt clings to each inhale
to fill my chest whole
i'll hold you comfortably
quietly, intimately,
a release
a slow surrender